The Wimpification of the Modern Male

If you have read (or are reading) my book, 5 Conversations You Must Have With Your Son, you know that I’m deeply concerned about the wimpification we see among men today in TV, movies, advertisements, and other media outlets. We are fooling ourselves if we think our children (sons and daughters) are not absorbing this sissified portrayal of men on some basic level. That said, a recent Washington Times article highlights a new slew of emasculating shows in the fall line-up that you may want to discourage your children from watching. The article, entitled “Fall TV’s mean women, milquetoast men” says:

If the fall TV season is any guide, the sexual revolution that was supposed to liberate men and women from traditional sex roles seems to have resulted instead in a straight-up role reversal. The male characters are messes – insecure, jobless, barely able to dress themselves without a wife or girlfriend and/or living in mom’s proverbial basement. Their female counterparts, meanwhile, are flaunting the same selfish, boorish ways that once got men called “chauvinist pigs.” The only difference today is that when these female characters act like jerks, we are expected to cheer them on as “empowered.” (Click here to read the remainder of the article about the fall line-up of emasculating shows.)

Anyway, the article got me thinking about the first chapter in my book, entitled “The Wimpification of the Modern Male,” and particularly, the role mothers play in encouraging their sons to become the men God created them to be. If you don’t have a copy of the book, enjoy the excerpt below.

(Excerpt: 5 Conversations You Must Have With Your Son/Chapter One)

The natives are restless. And by natives, I mean the men of America – the real men who value their masculinity and have decided to rise up and reclaim it. After years spent attempting to tame their testosterone in order to fit the feminized mold of manhood as defined by popular opinion, they’ve had enough. The Marlboro Man (minus the cancer stick affixed in the corner of his mouth) is making a comeback, and I can assure you he won’t be stopping by Starbucks for an Iced Caramel Frappuccino on his way into town.

In Wild at Heart, author, John Eldredge sums up the challenge our boys face: “Society at large can’t make up its mind about men. Having spent the last thirty years redefining masculinity into something more sensitive, safe, manageable and, well, feminine, it now berates men for not being men.” In 1 Chronicles 12:22, it speaks of the men of Issachar who “understood the temper of the times and knew the best course for Israel to take.” As mothers, we will be one of the strongest voices in our sons’ lives. Like the men of Issachar, we too, must understand the temper of the times and determine the best course to take when it comes to raising our sons to model biblical manhood.

As mothers of sons, God has entrusted us to nurture their hearts and encourage them to become the godly men He created them to be. Our society appears bent on waging a war against the very things that grow boys into men. No wonder men today feel emasculated. At every turn, they are forced to temper their testosterone and stifle their inner warrior spirit. Boys do not thrive when we treat them like girls. In the book, Wild Things, authors (and therapists), Steven James and David Thomas say, “Instead of fighting against boys and their basic character, we must learn to work with how they were created and redirect them toward a noble vision of masculinity. Helping boys grow and mature into men means providing an environment that acknowledges and supports them in their maleness, not one that demands they be different.” As mothers, we must be our sons’ advocates and raise them in a way that celebrates manhood. We need to give our boys permission to be boys. If we continue to force them to comply to a sissified system of order, we will lose a generation of men.

I love that: “We must learn to work with how they were created and redirect them toward a noble vision of masculinity.” In what ways are you de-emphasizing the culture’s wimpy definition of manhood and redirecting your sons toward a noble vision of masculinity in your home? Share your wisdom and let’s ban together to raise a generation of real men!

P.S. If you haven’t heard the buzz about the new movie, Courageous (set to hit theaters on September 30th), check it out by clicking here. I had the privilege of pre-screening the movie several months ago and it does a fabulous job of “redirecting men toward a noble vision of masculinity.” I am praying the message behind the movie will ignite a revival among our men to lead their homes in the way God intended.