A conversation DAD must have with his daughter?

Since 5 Conversations You Must Have With Your Daughter released two years ago, I’ve encouraged both moms and dads to read it and engage in key conversations with their daughters, even though the book is targeted to moms. Now, a new study backs up the tremendous need for dads to step up to the plate and take an active role in talking to their daughters about issues related to today’s sexually promiscuous culture.

CBS.com had this to say about the new study:

NEW YORK, Oct. 4, 2010

Dads: Birds and the Bees Talk Not Just for Sons

New Study Reveals Daughters, Ages 19 to 21, Say Dads Should Do More to Prepare Them for Sex and Dating

Dr. Jennifer Hartstein, child and adolescent psychologist and “Early Show” contributor, joined “Early Show” co-anchor Harry Smith to discuss how important it is for dads to be in on that sometimes awkward, but always beneficial, conversation.

According to Hartstein, having “the talk” early in this day in age is very important.

“We have so much research that supports the fact (that) starting it early and having it continuously protects all our kids, daughters and sons, from making bad decisions in relationships, sexually, posting inappropriate pictures, sexting — all that stuff has to start as early as your kids start talking to you about it,” she said. (Click here to read the entire article.)

If your daughter is approaching middle school (or is already in middle school or older), I would definitely advise dads to look over Conversation #3 and highlight key passages to discuss with their daughters. When a dad speaks up about pressures related to sex, dating, and other issues that can impact his daughter’s reputation (sexting, etc.), he offers a powerful voice in the battle for his daughter’s purity. While the thought of having to broach this topic can be unsettling, the consequences of remaining silent can be far more unsettling in the end. Besides, who better than good ol’ dad to offer his daughter a uniquely male perspective on the topic? It’s a father’s duty to protect his daughter. In fact, I would argue that the most effective birth control available to our daughters is hands down, a thriving father/daughter relationship.


  1. Beth says

    Thank you so much for sharing this. My daughter often pushes her daddy away, but I keep encouraging him to keep trying. She needs him and she needs to hear things like this from him.

  2. Nicole says

    Hey Vicki and/or any other ladies who want to comment!

    I am wondering if there is a quick answer for my question…What age do you recommend the big “talk”? I have a 3rd grader, who is very mature for her age physically and emotionally.

    Thank you so much!!!

  3. says

    I’m so very thankful for my husband and his love for our girls. Not only has he done a great job fathering our oldest (son)…he’s been fantastic at loving our teen girls.
    They trust him….with everything!


  4. says

    Great reminder of how important the relationship between Dad’s and daughters are. I have always done the technical talks with the girls, but I will certainly encourage my husband to give a male viewpoint.

    @ Nicole – each child is different. Is she curious? My daughters were about her age when we started talking about puberty. Be open to opportunities to communicate throughout the next few years – not just looking for a time to have one big talk about sex. We talked earlier about it from a reproduction standpoint and then many years later as a source of enjoyment for a husband and wife. You have about a two year window here to talk your head off until she starts rolling her eyes at you! : ) Good luck!

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